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Kiran

Post #825 – 19990412

April 12, 1999

Master P,

Imagine my delight in finding this extensive monument to your work. I hope you’ll be proud to know that I’ve diligently shirked responsibility for the last couple of days in my exploration of it. What’s a credit rating good for, anyway?

Although I’ve long since abandoned my efforts to duplicate your impressive physical stature (foiled by some nonsense about “metabolism”), I continue to draw creative inspiration from your writing. In a word (or 2), you rock!

Since I so enjoy your writing, I’m interested in your general opinion of the book-to-movie conversion which has become so prevalent lately. I, for one, was pretty soured on the idea until I saw some of what’s come out in the last few years. Of course, just like anything else, a lot is bad, but some is good. I read your comments on the TV movie of “The Hoboken Chicken Emergency”, but didn’t find them falling on one side or the other. Have you ever been approached about turning a book of yours into a feature film? If so, how do you feel about it?

Kiran

P.S.: I’ve yet to find a cooler fictional (or non-fictional for that matter) character than Clarence Yojimbo. But then, it’s pretty hard to compete with the whole Venusian thing.

Daniel replies:

When THE HOBOKEN CHICKEN EMERGENCY first aired on TV, the only part I liked was the credits which were shown over drawings I had done for the book. I was watching on the set in my office, and Jill was downstairs, watching on the set in hers. At the midpoint, (there must have been an intermission, or station identification break), Jill came up to watch with me, and found that I had switched channels, and was looking at a Dragnet re-run. Bored, you see, with the adaptation of my book. I received a total of $2,700 ever from the publisher for that movie deal, and I got about 7 letters from kids, all of whom said the same thing: ""I bet you had nothing to do with that TV show."" Adults tend to get excited about it, and pretend they like it. 
At any given time there are options taken on certain books of mine. The possiblity that a Hollywood company will actually make something, and that it will be any good, is remote. However, I will take your money, if you're in that line of work, and want to try.


Jodi

Post #826 – 19990412

April 12, 1999

I am writing a paper on your contribution to Young Adult Literature. I just wanted to know, is it true you were raised by rhinoceri? I love your work and I want to be just like you when I don’t grow up.

While I’m at it , when did you say “The Afterlife Diet” would be reissued?

Daniel replies:

Soon. Any time now. I haven't heard lately. Maybe already. I don't know. I was raised by geese, or possibly swans, or maybe ducks. Some kind of barnyard fowl. I am said to own a pair of pet rhinos. Is it true?


Matthew West

Post #824 – 19990410

April 10, 1999

Hello Daniel. Long ago, my friend Daniel Feldman and I began reading your books, and I have been chuckling to myself ever since. I am 26 now, and I still recommend your books to friends. Cutting to the chase, I have always wondered if there was an off chance that you had named Ned Feldman after my friend (He used to write to you) No worries, there won’t be any lawsuits or anything, I am just straining to find a connection with the supreme author that is you. Also, I have tried all the websites that I know of, and can’t think of any other way to get a copy of Yobgorgle, Mystery Monster of Lake Ontario–unless I steal it from the library back home. Could you point me in the right direction? It is my favorite book–especially due to my connection with the illuminati.

Daniel replies:

No, Ned Feldman is named after another guy named Feldman--and he's in his own book. In THE SNARKOUT BOYS AND THE BACONBURG HORROR, there's a Scott Feldman. That book, YOBGORGLE, MYSTERY MONSTER OF LAKE ONTARIO; BORGEL; and THE WORMS OF KUKUMLIMA are all going to be published in one volume like 5 NOVELS. This was agreed to in December, and any week now the publisher will give me papers to sign. After that, it's supposed to take just a few months, since the books are all written, and in print, and need nothing except to be shot, and bound. So you don't have to steal and be destroyed by guilt.


Hilary Hattenbach

Post #822 – 19990407

April 7, 1999

Dear Mr. Pinkwater,

A friend of mine is trying to find your book “I snorked with a zombie”. I’d like to get it for him as a surprise. Is it available anywhere? We’ve come up empty.

Please let me know.

Hilary Hattenbach

Daniel replies:

It's I SNARKED WITH A ZOMBIE, and the thing about that book is...it doesn't exist. I was going to write it, but there was one of a thousand idiotic goofs by some publisher, and it didn't get to happen. I may get around to it. Thanks for wanting to find it.


Adrienne Waterston

Post #823 – 19990407

April 7, 1999

Dear Daniel,

I had this boyfriend once, if you could call him that, and he extolled the virtues of your book about a boy who had wings and flew about hither and thither. He attached all sorts of meaning to the book and used your name with such reverence that when I discovered you on NPR and realized that he wasn’t just making you up, I decided I would actually look up this very self-same book about which he ranted and raved oh so long ago. You wouldn’t perhaps have any idea which book that would be, would you (having written it yourself, perhaps I thought you might)? And knowing which book (Flying man? Or something?), would you then also know where I might find a copy?

If you can help me I would be eternally in your debt. Thanks so much,

Adrienne Waterston

Daniel replies:

 It's WINGMAN. I read it on Chinwag Theater, and had you made sure your local public radio station carried the program, you might have heard it, even taped it. We'll repeat it, but probably not for a year at least. And we aren't yet selling tapes or CDs. AND...the book is out of print. But you may find a used copy. Organize your friends. Make the Program Director schedule us. Don't accept any excuses. You're missing good stuff right now.


Tony Pezzotta

Post #821 – 19990406

April 6, 1999

Dear Mr. Daniel Pinkwater.

We share the same first name and have the same last initial. I’m a D.P. too. Maybe we’re related. Maybe we’re actually the same person but don’t know it.

Anyway, I resent the fact that your books are designated as “children’s books”. I’m 18 and I still read them. Actually I don’t resent that because I’m probably still a children in both mind and action. Probably in facial hair too.

My friend and I are considering making a Wild Dada Ducks club. We might actually have a duckette or two. Do I have your permission to call it the “Wild Dada Ducks” Club or do I have to send money in order to obtain a “Wild Dada Ducks Club License” as part of the operational bureaucracy that plagues our world. I’ll give you $5 max.

Thanks.

Daniel Pezzotta

Daniel replies:

You have permission, but if you get into trouble, I never heard of you.


Suzanne Morgan

Post #820 – 19990405

April 5, 1999

I am anxious to hear Chinwag Theatre. The public radio stations in DC do not caqrry it.

Is it available on the Internet? I have been unable to find it.

Daniel replies:

If you send mail, or email, or call the Program Director, or the General Manager at your local public radio station, and ask for Chinwag Theater, s/he will possibly get it for you. If you and several friends, (each of whom has gotten several other friends to write), demand Chinwag Theater, the Program Director, or General Manager _will_ get it for you. Some stations have not even listened to it, because it's a kids' program, and they aren't interested in those. When forced to listen, many decide to carry it. It isn't available on the internet--you have to talk the station into getting it. (It's free!)


Neal and Olga

Post #819 – 19990405

April 5, 1999

Dear Daniel Pinkwater,

I enjoy your stories. I think you should make cartoons for t.v. with your characters and make them come to life. This letter is from one of your listeners, Neal Mandela Sanger of Little Rock, Arkansas. I hope you like = this letter. I am 5 and 1/2. How old are you?

Love, Neal.

P.S. We loved the Big Orange Splat and named one of our cats Sweetie Pie. Wempires are our favorite people. We all love the Blue Moose. We love the stories that you write and tell. Be nice to Charity.

Love, Neal’s Mom, Olga.

Olga Skorapa

Daniel replies:

Dear Neal: Of course I am nice to Charity! I love Charity! Charity does all the work, and is a nice person besides. I am so glad you like the radio program. Please tell the radio station you like it. 
Thanks again.


Rhonda Searles

Post #818 – 19990403

April 3, 1999

What was your favorite book that you wrote?

Daniel replies:

 I hate all my books! Well, I may not actually hate them, but I don't like them very much. Except the one I am going to write next...now _that's_ going to be a good book!


Erik Durfey

Post #817 – 19990331

March 31, 1999

Hi,

I am trying to find a copy of a story Daniel Pinkwater did on NPR probably around 1987 on the “All Things Considered” show. I believe it was called something like “On Becoming an Artist”. I would love to have a copy on tape if that is possible.

Thanks,

erik

Daniel replies:

The story (actually stories) you want are in an out of print book called CHICAGO DAYS, HOBOKEN NIGHTS. It will very soon be reprinted, combined with the first collection of short essays, FISH WHISTLE, under the title HOBOKENFISH AND CHICAGOWHISTLE, available from Xlibris < http://www.xlibris.com >. Or you can maybe find a used copy somewhere.


Roxann H. Daily

Post #816 – 19990331

March 31, 1999

On the Chinwag Theatre presentation last week concerning moose, you made the comment that you didn’t think moose were dangerous. Actually, according to folks who live in Alaska, moose can be extremely dangerous. Reportedly, they are not very intelligent animals, and have been known to charge for no apparent reason, and may stomp their victim to death.

Daniel replies:

Moose not intelligent animals? Ridiculous. Moose are the most intelligent animal there is--except my father, of course.


Oovnik

Post #815 – 19990328

March 28, 1999

Dear Mr. Pinkwater,

John Scezieca (did I spell it right?) extolled the virtues of your books for middle-school reading in the Time Warp Trio’s “Summer Reading is Killing Me.” The book list for middle schoolers that he has says “pretty much anything by Daniel Pinkwater.” Have you ever met John S? Are you friends?

Daniel replies:

I have never met Jon Scieszka, and we are not friends--but we have friendly feelings for one another, I think. Actually, there is a federal law that Scieszka and I cannot be in the same place at the same time, because of possible warpage.


Jamie M Heise

Post #814 – 19990228

February 28, 1999

I was just re-reading Chicago Days / Hoboken Nights and I couldn’t help noticing that various elements of our favorite Pinkwater novels were loosely based on events which took place in real life. (“Wait-a-minute! I recognize this part… This appears in Five Novels!”) My question is this: is The Education of Robert Nifkin semi-autobiographical? Did you ever have a teacher who fought in the Spanish Civil War? And is there an actual theater like the Snark (and if so, where is it)? Thanks

Daniel replies:

No comment.


Jeanette Zollinger

Post #813 – 19990224

February 24, 1999

Dear Mr. Pinkwater,

I am taking an adolescent literature class at Brigham Young University and I am doing a research project about you. Aren’t you flattered? The project is a little unconventional which is why I have chosen you as my subject. My husband has been a fan of yours for many years and he introduced me to your work. He claims that you have a pet llama and I have also heard you have a pet rhinocerous. I would be interested in knowing if eaither of these assumptions are true and if they are, what are the names of your extraordinary pets? Thank you very much for your time.

Gratefullly yours,

Jeanette Zollinger

Daniel replies:

Our pair of African rhinos are named Melvyn and Phyllis. They are wonderful pets. We've had them for ages. They love to curl up by the fireplace on winter days like this. They come when called, and love to be scratched behind the ears. I like to take Melvyn for walks most mornings, and he gets very excited when he sees me moving toward the car with his leash in my hand. He loves going to the park, and he has special favorites among he other rhinos we meet there. My only criticism of Melvyn is that he becomes overly excited when we are riding in the car, and he sees other rhinos. I would say that rhinos make excellent pets. If they are properly trained and cared for they will return your affection, and can be trustworthy and enjoyable family members.


Gary R. Maslow

Post #812 – 19990223

February 23, 1999

Howdy Mr. Pinkwater. I am a student at Dartmouth College and have started a children’s radio show for the kids at the children’s hospital here, called Mystery and Myth. I heard about your Chinwag theatre radio show and was wondering if you had any advice for a group of students interesting in entertaining children over the radio. I also liked your book Fat Men from Space so much that I ate it, just kidding, but it did look pretty tasty with those burgers on the cover. Yours on the radio,

gary maslow

p.s. I am also in a children’s literature course at dartmouth with Randy Testa and was going to come interview you, but that fell through, I was wondering if I could send you some questions over e-mail and do an interview that way or over the phone. Thanks for the laughs.

Daniel replies:

I wouldn't presume to give advice, but I can tell you a little about our aproach to Chinwag Theater. To make it simple, I'll just say that I think ""Barney"" is an obscenity, and maybe a crime. It's a school for bad taste and there is something unwholesome about those cyborg child actors. So, what Charity Nebbe and I agree upon, and try to keep in mind in making our radio program is that we ought to respect our listeners and not treat them like little idiots. It's not a big deal, but surprising how few people share that attitude. I think that, in his free time, Barney hates children, and eats them. I suggest you approach your local public radio station, and ask them to download Chinwag Theater for you. It's on the satellite, (I think we send it on Wednesdays). It's free for the taking by any non-profit radio station, so do me a favor and suggest to the Program Director that s/he make a copy for station evaluation too. See if you like what we do, if you can identify an approach, and whether you agree with it or not. You're welcome to broadcast the program along with yours if you want to.
Sure we can do something via email, or phone, or tape cassette, but I suggest it be a class project lest I deal with you, and then one of your classmates also wants to question me, etc. You can conduct your Q&A right here in this forum, and allow anyone who's interested to observe the process. Give my best wishes to Randy Testa, and tell him I like this approach better.


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