Isaac Hoffer

January 1, 1997

Dear Mr. Pinkwater:

Your books have inspired me to be a better person, taught me that my adolescent cynicism was merely a chemical reaction and that life was really something to be enjoyed, and helped me enjoy my already expading girth. I am renowned in my neighbourhood as a large and vicious teenager, but, immediately after reading the Afterlife Diet, I distributed loose change and hotdogs among the poor and joined an impromptu urban quartet in a rendition of Paul Simon’s “Crazy Love.” Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

How can you not love a large and vicious teenager?