December 3, 2020

pickle preferences?

Hi Mister Pinkwater!

I am 16 years old, and have been a fan of yours for awhile now. I didn’t really know what to ask you, so I thought I might as well ask you about your pickle preferences. Do you like pickles? If so, how do ya like ’em? I like mine crunchy, crisp, and very sour. To my knowledge you can also get them sweet too, although I have never tried those ones in particular.

Apart from that, I don’t really know what else to ask, so I might as well say that you are probably my favorite author, and I’ve read webster’s english dictionary! Or should I say Clarence Yojimbo’s  japanese-english dictionary? Ha Ha. Ha ha ha. Jokes aside you really are one of my favorite authors, and you’re probably pretty cool. Also no, my name is not really Max Meteor, that’s just my stage name (I am in a glam-punk band with me and a few friends called Darth Walter and the Thunderkids)

Here is a poster I made for said band. I think I look pretty cool.

This is a band poster for said band. yeah, that's me. 

your friend-

Max Military boots Meteor

Daniel replies:

Half-sour, definitely half-sour, those are the crunchiest, if you can get them from a really good picklewright, or a deli supplied by one. The ones that come in a jar and are marketed as half-sour kosher dills are ok if you live in some wilderness. When they go all the way sour they lose some of their snap. Pickles are good for your body and eating them will raise your IQ. Also a knowledge and understanding of pickles is a mark of education and taste. I don't know if you're into classical studies and mythology, but the gods ate half-sour pickles on Olympus.