Nathan Pieplow
Post #1569 – 20021108
November 8, 2002
Dear Mr. Pinkwater,
A quick search of the archives turned up this old conversation:
>What is in / how do you make a borgelnuskie?
>
> Travis Schneider — I believe I have gone into this
> topic before in this very forum. It is illegal to tell another
> person how to make or obtain a borgelnuskie. Only licensed
> borgelnuskie-makers are supposed to deal with them, and, of
> course, they can’t be sent through the mail. Except in Utah.
This presents me with a dilemma. You see, sometime in the late fall of 1998, after twelve years of meditation on this very topic, the recipe for borgelnuskies was revealed to me in a dream. I am not making this up. I knew at once that the recipe was authentic: it resounded with Truth. But I always kind of suspected I was never meant to know it. Perhaps I accidentally intercepted some telepathic message in my half-conscious state. Nevertheless, the damage is done. Where do I get one of these licenses?
Nathan Pieplow
Boulder, Colorado
Daniel replies:
I can supply you with one, but I must warn you--they're quite expensive.
Sam Sussman
Post #1568 – 20021106
November 6, 2002
Hello,
there is no particular reason I am writing, just to kill time. But I must say your books are fabulous,
Sincerely,
Sam Sussman
Daniel replies:
I must say, I appreciate your saying so.
Sasha Torchinsky
Post #1566 – 20021104
November 4, 2002
Dear Mr. Pinkwater,
I love your books and I’ve read all of them at least 3 times. My name is Sasha Torchinsky and I am 12.
I have written a homage poem to you and one of your books, Borgel, which is my favourite. I love Fafner he reminds me of my dog.
Time, Space and the Other
An Homage to Daniel Pinkwater
By: Sasha Torchinsky
Who are we?
Where are we?
What time is it?
We are space
Somewhere
No one knows
Space is a bagel with poppy seeds
Time is a map of New Jersey
The Other is a mixed salad with only one thing you like in it
Philosophy is right? Wrong!
Nothing is right
You decide the course of your own life
I decide the course of everyone else’s.
I hope you like my poem, are you coming out with anymore books? Please respond if possible.
Sasha Torchinsky
P.S. I hope Jill is okay, I love her books too.
Daniel replies:
It is a fine poem, and I am filled with pride at the fine readers my books somehow attract. Not least of these is Sasha Torchinsky. Jill is more than okay, and I will convey your words of appreciation to her.
David Myers
Post #1567 – 20021104
November 4, 2002
Dear Mr. Pinkwater and authorised inspirer that inspired me to write about (future) penguins,
I am a 10 year old boy ( or penguin whichever you perfer) boy who lives in Maryland. I am most recently reading your The Afterlife diet and I thought the part about the mistform Robert Frost poem was really (or penguinly) funny. My most creative thought right now is about a penguin who likes to wear neckties and communicates with other penguins by snapping his necktie in different directions and in different beats. Well keep up the good writing.And one request is to make a Borgel 2 I really liked borgel and admired it. Well bye.
sincerely David Myers boy ( or penguin whichever you prefer)
Daniel replies:
I prefer penguin. I myself experienced penguinism for much of my 17th year. I variously horrified, amused and enlightened persons in Chicago, London, and at Bard College with my plaintive penguin cries, and penguinesque posturings. I ultimately gave it up, but considered it time well spent. I am honored to have a reader of your evident quality.
Rachel Reynolds
Post #1565 – 20021102
November 2, 2002
My dear sir,
I am a long time admirer. I must beg one question to you. Please answer sincerely, I am truly desperate:
Is Robert Nifkin single, and where can I get a hold of him???
~A desperate teen in Portland, Oregon
Daniel replies:
You see...Robert Nifkin is a fictional character. In real life, he'd be just a little more of an idiot, and you'd have to civilize him and train him yourself. However, if RN is your idea of a suitable catch, you should have a fairly successful time of it.
Sunny
Post #1564 – 20021101
November 1, 2002
I was amazed! I was reading through this mournfully remembering when I once owned a vintage marine band radio that picked up NPR out here in the woods, when I stumbled upon your description of The Chicken Thing. It also works with cats, sir. I kept my terminally ill feline alive (at twenty pounds) for six years after her diagnoses. In cases when I (as an anthropology major) could not afford cat-chicken, she enjoyed cheesy spaghetti-o’s, too. And butter. Who doesn’t?
As interesting as I found all that, however, this is why I wrote: should you ever hit Missouri in your travels, I offer you venison chilli and the rhubarb custard pie, with a very nicely spicy Norton wine. Thank you for your books.
Daniel replies:
I'll bring the spaghetti-o's.
Maureen Spada
Post #1563 – 20021030
October 30, 2002
Is it possible to receive the titles of book(s) to be read on weekend edition with Scott IN ADVANCE? I would love it and so would my local bookstore in Woodstock,NY: The Golden Notebook. The books are always big sellers and very popular, and need to be ordered. I buy all of the books you discuss/read for my school library!!! Love the show, Maureen Spada Thanks a lot!
Daniel replies:
If you see me on Tinker Street, or eating zucchini fritatas at Joshua's in Woodstock, you can ask me what the next book is--and if I know, I will tell you. (Often I don't know, because we haven't made a final pick until two or three days before the program airs). To publish the titles much in advance would be sort of against the spirit of book reviewing and public radio.
I do love that the books we feature do well. I love that the authors and illustrators may get a nice check...if they have skillful publishers who exploit the exposure. Then there are the other kind of publishers, the kind I plan to expose to daylight in the near future. You know who you are, Marshall Cavendish.
Jack Fleck
Post #1562 – 20021029
October 29, 2002
Dear Mr. Pinkwater,
I was surprised to hear the Chicago had a central traffic control system (“Night at the Department of Water and Sewers” from Funny Times, November, 2002) when you were a kid. Were you kidding? Do they still have it? Does your friend Harry still work there?
I am an interested Traffic Engineer in San Francisco where we are interested in installing a central traffic control system.
Daniel replies:
This took place in the mid-1950s, and I seem to remember it as more or less true...but I could be wrong. Probably everything is different by now. Or maybe not.
Lee Squires
Post #1560 – 20021027
October 27, 2002
Le Chat,
one of my multitudinous children has the misfortune to enjoy figure skating. Be that as it may, there is an interesting device that is sometimes used in their off ice training. I wondered if you have ever encountered it. It is an electronic device which measures the apex of the height of their jump (and is called, somewhat unimaginatively, an altimeter… I would have called it something more smashing – perhaps a “Zenith Marker 26917”). I was curious, has anyone ever measured the height of your miraculous hove? How high DO you fly? Do you indeed smash all previous records? Were you offered scads of money to do a study?
And can you tell that great jumping story again?
The Old Woman Who Lives in a Shoe
Daniel replies:
You must refer to the well-known photo of DP levitating. As to a story, there is hardly one--simply a fact known to ballet dancers and basketball players to the effect that when you go up, and before you begin coming down, there is a moment when you are going neither way. The idea is to expand that moment.
Emily
Post #1561 – 20021027
October 27, 2002
Dear Mr. Daniel Pinkwater,
Thank you for writing all of your wonderful/interesting/great/fabulous/just plain awesome books that I really enjoy reading.
P.S.
What times/days are you on NPR?
Sincerely, Emily
Daniel replies:
I'm glad you enjoy my wonderful, interesting, great, fabulous, and awesome books--also the just plain ones. I am on NPR at irregular intervals, but lately about once a week on All Things Considered, and once a month on Weekend Edition Saturday. In the former case, they use commentaries to fill up odd holes in the program.
The Mad Librarian
Post #1559 – 20021025
October 25, 2002
Que Pasa Mio Descamisado!
What up with yo’ bad ol’ se’f there in Hyde Park? I was working again, finally, in OK and got laid off. (Damn the Economy and Damn Dubya anyway)! Now I head West and try to restablish life. I found something worse than a publisher. That would be People that are in charge of Oklahoma Library Reading Policies. Believe it or not these schtunks actually practice censorship. Makes me wanna upchuck sometimes that a child must ask parental permission to study a book on necromancy or get a copy of kama sutra. (They do have kama sutra and a few sordid and assorted sex books but kids can’t look at them.) So anyway how ya been?
Your Mad Librarian (Weary of life in the USA)
Daniel replies:
Opinions expressed in this forum do not necessarily reflect those held by DP, Ed the Curator, The Oklahoma Committee for Literary Decency, or actually much of anyone other than the expresser.
Brad Sondahl
Post #1558 – 20021024
October 24, 2002
I think those art history majors both should be flunked. Everyone knows he signed it R. Mutt– a world of difference from A Mutt. And it’s probably laden with deep meaning. Before he died, essayist Stephen Jay Gould and his wife began exploring the cosmic and mathematical meaning of his works, and came up with lots of amazing stuff.
However, the reason I’m writing is to thank you again for your link on your page to my pottery (which moved a year or so ago and I’ve sent the new link to the webmeister), and offer again if you need any pottery, ask, and it shall be USPS’d.
I’ve also added pages on the Shoe Tree of Idaho, Cooking by Dead Reckoning, and other superfluous topics.
Daniel replies:
We are always happy to do our bit for culture.
(We use our Sondahl bowls constantly, and get pleasure from handling them and looking at them).
Justin Sharman
Post #1557 – 20021022
October 22, 2002
I was sitting in a coffeehouse on my college campus a few months ago, and I couldn’t help but overhear a conversation between two Art History majors. They were discussing Marcell Duchamp, and how much they wished there was a full year-long class on him and his work. They went about analyzing some of his pieces. At one point, they argured about three or four different meanings that one can find regarding the “A Mutt” signature Duchamp put on “Fountain”.
So the question: if I were to be thrust into a situation like this again, is there a polite way to tell them that they’re pretentious bastards? Likewise, if I break up in laughter, and I’m asked what I’m laughing at, should I just say I remembered something funny I heard on the radio that morning?
Daniel replies:
Has it occurred to you that the two Art History majors might have been deliberately having that conversation for you to overhear--in order to put you on? Why do you remember this incident ""a few months"" later, and why were you sitting in a coffeehouse instead of studying in the library? I think you should take an Art History course. It sounds to me like you're well on the way to writing a great paper on Duchamp
Emily Wean
Post #1556 – 20021021
October 21, 2002
Hey Mr. Pinkwater!
This is Emily Wean from Boston, Massachusetts. I’m 10 years old and in 5th grade. I am one of your greatest fans. I’ve been enjoying your books since before I could read. One of the stories that I just finished today of yours was The Snarkout Boys and the Baconburg Horror. My dad and I together are reading Alan Mendelsohn the Boy From Mars. We have noticed (or actually my dad has noticed) that in both of those books, the towns have to do with pigs (in Alan Mendelsohn, it is Hogboro.) Is there a special connection between those two towns, or do you have any other books that have towns that have pigish things in their names?
Now, MY question was this: I have your book of four novels with the foreword by Scott Simon. I think it says the date that the WHOLE book was published, but I don’t know about the four books not put together. I actually am only wondering about three of them, because I haven’t read the second one yet. If you could tell me what the dates are of Borgel, The Worms of Kukulima, and The Snarkout Boys and the Baconburg Horror, that would be really cool.
Thanks!
Emily
Daniel replies:
Clue: A poem about Chicago by Carl Sandburg. Dates: I don't actually remember, and I am too lazy to look them up. They were all written before 1990, I know that for sure. Maybe Ed knows.
Yup, try here. -- Ed.
Fran
Post #1555 – 20021020
October 20, 2002
The monkey that ate potatoes ate lemons and fell off the tree into a old house with a shoe, potatoes fell from the sky and eat cheese miraculously until potatoes fell largely. Does that make enough sense?
Daniel replies:
Yes, but I think it's against to law for me to advise people which numbers to play.
