(Enter Stage left: My name) Ellie

February 8, 2017

Post #4381 – 20170208

Be it logical or not (god forbid) I find myself having a fit over borglnuskies, whether or not I can spell them correctly. My younger siblings are experiencing the joys of the two Snarkout Boys bookstore the first time, and I am here pondering over pig-related byproducts are left to name cities and towns after. Unfortunately, not very many! I understand this to be the true meaning for a lack of following Snarkout Boys stories, however, it's not too late to consult the meat industry for ideas. I have read some excerpt from somewhere mentioning some unstated inner sense of re-writing the same story. Ah, yes, don't we all. Try taking up a new, more lucrative and sensible passion, like training cats how to use rotary dial phones, or naming towns and cities after cow-related byproducts. If you have read this far, I hope you understand that I am not in fact a peculiar teenager with a knack for killing conversations by sheerly trying to express that I exist, but a higher being capable of wasting office supplies like nobody's business, torturing cats, and pretending that they have some sense of purpose despite knowing that they –

[Due to excessive lengthy small talk, this message has been abrieviated. If you find yourself foolish enough to seek further banter, you should think about seeing a phsycuatrist. If you are in any way connected to Daniel Pinkwater, you don't need to seek out a Phsiciatrist- your case is beyond their support]
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[pronounced Byurokratiya komunistychnykh profesionaliv Krytytsi – Ed.]

Daniel replies:

I'm not sure if this is information you seek, but under the present administration it is likely that regulations blocking interstate transport of borgelnuskies will be lifted. I have no opinion about this one way or the other. I am just a simple teller of tales.