I have in hand a Xerox advance copy of a shabby publication called Meet Daniel Pinkwater (part of the About the Author series from PowerKids Press, an imprint of Rosen Publishing Group, New York). I hasten to add that I have no connection with this project, and the book itself is a scandalous screed. However, on Page 8 there is a group photo of scholars at the Louis B. Nettelhorst School, dated 1949. Front row, third from the left is my cherubic self, appearing precisely as I do today. In the same row, third from the right, is a young Micheal Sideman. Should you acquire a copy of this disreputable little book, and scrutinize your image, recorded before you ingested the bulk of a lifetime of deadly Chicago hot dogs, and then regard your countenance as it is today, reflected in a mirror, you will see all too clearly what damage you may have done.