Dan McDermott

February 26, 2000

Post #1046 – 20000226

A group of friends and I have a government-approved opportunity to close off a section of a main street in our home town and perform in front of a large group of people, so long as our performance has a “No Smoking” theme.

Our plan was to wear paper bags over our heads and run around frantically for five minutes, spraying each other with spritzer bottles and shouting “Cancer! Cancer!” Perhaps we will even decorate our paper bags with beutiful pictures of various sea mammals and farm equipment. My question for you is: would this endevour be approved by the Wild Dada Ducks? Could we be inducted as official members?

Pineapples are good.

sincerely,

Dan “The Grand PooF” McDermott

Daniel replies:

The Wild Dada Ducks are fictional ducks, as you know, so you are wise to seek their fictional opinion. Speaking for myself, your projected ceremony may be just a teensy bit...rational? If somehow you could make it clear that it is just as bad to smoke scallions as tobacco you would be performing a service for all of mankind.