Patrick Clark

September 26, 2020

Evidence of Venusian Life? Duh!

Dear Mr. Pinkwater,

As you are no doubt aware, scientists have recently touted the detection of the chemical phosphine in the atmosphere of Venus as evidence of life on our sister planet. For reference, here is a Times article from a couple of weeks ago:

My question to you is this:

Why has it taken our best scientists so long to discover what fans of your prescient novels have known for decades?

Clearly the high levels of phosphine and indeed the cloudy Venusian atmosphere are both caused by the predominance of esoteric motorcycle gangs and their constant expirations during lengthy folk concerts. Duh!

I’d be willing to bet all the fleegix in Waka-Waka that Clarence Yojimbo himself is enjoying a hearty laugh at our collective naivete.




Daniel replies:

Well of course I was aware, and except for the current temporary pandemic crisis, I had already booked a vacation trip. I expect everyone will be going there soon, and this will ruin the natural ambiance, plus hotels and restaurants will up the prices. May as well go to France.