William Boerman-Cornell

September 4, 2000

Honored Doctor Captain Pinkwater, Sir,

I am an English teacher. I am not especially proud of this fact as my ilk have been responsible for vast fields of destruction of imaginative youngsters, and yet I try to be a force for good.

I am trying to decorate my classroom with letters and emails from famous and substantial people who rule the world. My criteria are that the people in question wield virtually immeasurable power and that they all have something in their body type or aesthetic appearance that does not resemble the plastic clones which clutter the advertising world.

So, O Great One, I humbly request from you a line or two, if possible to Mr. B-C’s Senior English students, giving them one or two book recommendations and a word of encouragement from the master.

Thank you, Doctor, for your attention to this matter.

Humbly,

William Boerman-Cornell

Teacher, theater-goer, and corn-dog aficionado

First I have to know what other individuals you have honored in this way.